ladies laaaaadies, theres plenty of me to go around *detaches arm* thats for you Brenda
I wish we said “fancy” in America. As in, “I fancy you.” It’s such a more agreeable term than “I have a crush on you.” What’s a crush? Like, I AM A BOA CONSTRICTOR AND I AM GOING TO IMMOBILIZE YOU WITH MY MISPLACED AND OBSESSIVE AFFECTION. “I fancy you” is like, you’re so shiny and glittery and I just want to put you on a shelf and look at you for a while ‘cause you’re fancy.
wow i really like this song i think i’m gonna listen to it 1 maybe 60 more times
its really hard being a Hindu, because i wanna taste beef but i can’t because of religion. damn.
mY SKIN IS WHITE???
I’M NOT INDIAN???? I’VE NOT BEEN A HINDU FOR 16 YEARS BECAUSE MY PARENTS ARE ALSO HINDUS??
cAN I FINALLY STOP WORSHIPPING COWS?!?!?!!
so im shopping for make up for the girlfriend bc valentines day and holy fuck how do you girls afford this shit
$80 for eye shadow???
is it made out of unicorn shit
what is naked 3
why is it called naked
will it make her look naked
why is it $50
that’s 50 cheese burgers
i can’t deal with make up good bye
There are these little tiny fuzzy bugs that are flying around my pear tree and I kind of want to call them cute but I feel like the second I do someone’s gonna tell me they’re like the spawns of satan and they sting people and kill my trees
Nevermind they’re called “Woolly Aphids” and they’re literal fairies
I feel bad for calling them evil now they’re so frickin cute